Sunday, April 11, 2010

 

communal love?

are my notions of phileo love so abstract no one understands?
i probably am wrong when such a thing happens.

in genuine crises, artificial harmony will fade.

learning to love in a community requires effort and lots of dying of self.
all of them all.
brokenness needs to be done.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

so can there be such thing as peer lead?
thru loving those u lead lor.

ohwell.
taxing day.

byes


Saturday, April 10, 2010

 

"serve with the heart of a king, rule with the heart of a servant." [another random post]

got this quote from a certain significant someone who got it from a certain significant figure in the judiciary who is also a significant figure in the worship ministry :)

i have no idea and no depth of what it actually means nor concur with it. yet.
one day i will i guess.

recently i have been hearing about men (including the one mentioned above) who are leaders, ministry leaders, and ppl who have that heart factor praying that we come to the point of helplessness. so we can go on our knees.
will that time come sooner or later?
will that time force me to go on my knees?
or just go on my fees.

can there be such a thing as forgetting HOW to pray?
or is it juz a hardening of the heart factor and a choice not to be disciplined in the things which once enthralled our young junior faith.

things are only beginning.
the very things that inspired, like student ministry, is beginning to look daunting.
life issues are at the worse, and friendships have never been so strained.
do we sacrifice friendships that were built over so long over differences in leadership style?
i am sorry brother. it is an unfortunate turn of events, and a pitiful way things are unfolding after 9years.

i am sorry.

with all the forces of life pulling with one kind of relationship pulling over another kind. staying firm in brotherhood becomes a chore.
maybe leaders see differently. seeing how two certain cgls and their acgls becoming so jaded with all the indefinite changes and neverending transitions.

man. its saddening stuff man.
and the contrast is especially greater when i grew in a ministry that has challenged my view of christian ministry itself.
in fact if you look at Christ in the bible hor, the way He does stuff, it is really a kind of thing which challenges worldviews.

and i guess that is what we should live and love as. to challenge ourselves and those close to us and those in our influence. to challenge existing worldviews that may not be the fullest.

and herein comes another question. what if i cant lead as those who inspired and mentored me? i realise some of my greatest mentors aren't those who sit down with me and do a million page bs, but those whose lives are the million pages if the lifelong bs they had done and then lived out.

and that is true belief.
"Believe comes with courage, courage comes with passion, passion comes with conviction and conviction comes with a relationship." ~fuji

hope to come to that point where it becomes real..

it is discouraging to see more and more of my friends i grew up in youth, who lead bs and lead worship now leading a life that is aimless and confused of the gospel. man. why should i be surprised? even those who once had theo studies are now more concerned about fame or holidays.

do we need 20 years to turn nominal?
no it juz happens in an instant. it happens in the instant when we have chosen the way that is not The way.

so i guess lets not look at this person or that, and see that his "youthful passion sure will bring him far", or go like "wah that girl staffworker so solid one". you'll never know. the most ok one can be the most distant one.

so is it a duty when u see a brother and/or sister who seems to be fine, but something tells u some Something is eroding away. that zest, that love, that heart factor is losing it. so is it our duty if your good friend is headed for a life that is more concerned with enjoying rather than giving?
i would want my friends to do so when the day comes for me when i forget my Lord. i would want my friends to press on and perservere in the day when i refuse to hear, refuse to step out of my double lifestyle or a lipservice devo.
will i be that friend?

walk with Jesus daily.
God help us to.


 

"serve with the heart of a king, rule with the heart of a servant." [another random post]

got this quote from a certain significant someone who got it from a certain significant figure in the judiciary who is also a significant figure in the worship ministry :)

i have no idea and no depth of what it actually means nor concur with it. yet.
one day i will i guess.

recently i have been hearing about men (including the one mentioned above) who are leaders, ministry leaders, and ppl who have that heart factor praying that we come to the point of helplessness. so we can go on our knees.
will that time come sooner or later?
will that time force me to go on my knees?
or just go on my fees.

can there be such a thing as forgetting HOW to pray?
or is it juz a hardening of the heart factor and a choice not to be disciplined in the things which once enthralled our young junior faith.

things are only beginning.
the very things that inspired, like student ministry, is beginning to look daunting.
life issues are at the worse, and friendships have never been so strained.
do we sacrifice friendships that were built over so long over differences in leadership style?
i am sorry brother. it is an unfortunate turn of events, and a pitiful way things are unfolding after 9years.

i am sorry.

with all the forces of life pulling with one kind of relationship pulling over another kind. staying firm in brotherhood becomes a chore.
maybe leaders see differently. seeing how two certain cgls and their acgls becoming so jaded with all the indefinite changes and neverending transitions.

man. its saddening stuff man.
and the contrast is especially greater when i grew in a ministry that has challenged my view of christian ministry itself.
in fact if you look at Christ in the bible hor, the way He does stuff, it is really a kind of thing which challenges worldviews.

and i guess that is what we should live and love as. to challenge ourselves and those close to us and those in our influence. to challenge existing worldviews that may not be the fullest.

and herein comes another question. what if i cant lead as those who inspired and mentored me? i realise some of my greatest mentors aren't those who sit down with me and do a million page bs, but those whose lives are the million pages if the lifelong bs they had done and then lived out.

and that is true belief.
"Believe comes with courage, courage comes with passion, passion comes with conviction and conviction comes with a relationship." ~fuji

hope to come to that point where it becomes real..

it is discouraging to see more and more of my friends i grew up in youth, who lead bs and lead worship now leading a life that is aimless and confused of the gospel. man. why should i be surprised? even those who once had theo studies are now more concerned about fame or holidays.

do we need 20 years to turn nominal?
no it juz happens in an instant. it happens in the instant when we have chosen the way that is not The way.

so i guess lets not look at this person or that, and see that his "youthful passion sure will bring him far", or go like "wah that girl staffworker so solid one". you'll never know. the most ok one can be the most distant one.

so is it a duty when u see a brother and/or sister who seems to be fine, but something tells u some Something is eroding away. that zest, that love, that heart factor is losing it. so is it our duty if your good friend is headed for a life that is more concerned with enjoying rather than giving?
i would want my friends to do so when the day comes for me when i forget my Lord. i would want my friends to press on and perservere in the day when i refuse to hear, refuse to step out of my double lifestyle or a lipservice devo.
will i be that friend?

walk with Jesus daily.
God help us to.


 

"serve with the heart of a king, rule with the heart of a servant." [another random post]

got this quote from a certain significant someone who got it from a certain significant figure in the judiciary who is also a significant figure in the worship ministry :)

i have no idea and no depth of what it actually means nor concur with it. yet.
one day i will i guess.

recently i have been hearing about men (including the one mentioned above) who are leaders, ministry leaders, and ppl who have that heart factor praying that we come to the point of helplessness. so we can go on our knees.
will that time come sooner or later?
will that time force me to go on my knees?
or just go on my fees.

can there be such a thing as forgetting HOW to pray?
or is it juz a hardening of the heart factor and a choice not to be disciplined in the things which once enthralled our young junior faith.

things are only beginning.
the very things that inspired, like student ministry, is beginning to look daunting.
life issues are at the worse, and friendships have never been so strained.
do we sacrifice friendships that were built over so long over differences in leadership style?
i am sorry brother. it is an unfortunate turn of events, and a pitiful way things are unfolding after 9years.

i am sorry.

with all the forces of life pulling with one kind of relationship pulling over another kind. staying firm in brotherhood becomes a chore.
maybe leaders see differently. seeing how two certain cgls and their acgls becoming so jaded with all the indefinite changes and neverending transitions.

man. its saddening stuff man.
and the contrast is especially greater when i grew in a ministry that has challenged my view of christian ministry itself.
in fact if you look at Christ in the bible hor, the way He does stuff, it is really a kind of thing which challenges worldviews.

and i guess that is what we should live and love as. to challenge ourselves and those close to us and those in our influence. to challenge existing worldviews that may not be the fullest.

and herein comes another question. what if i cant lead as those who inspired and mentored me? i realise some of my greatest mentors aren't those who sit down with me and do a million page bs, but those whose lives are the million pages if the lifelong bs they had done and then lived out.

and that is true belief.
"Believe comes with courage, courage comes with passion, passion comes with conviction and conviction comes with a relationship." ~fuji

hope to come to that point where it becomes real..

it is discouraging to see more and more of my friends i grew up in youth, who lead bs and lead worship now leading a life that is aimless and confused of the gospel. man. why should i be surprised? even those who once had theo studies are now more concerned about fame or holidays.

do we need 20 years to turn nominal?
no it juz happens in an instant. it happens in the instant when we have chosen the way that is not The way.

so i guess lets not look at this person or that, and see that his "youthful passion sure will bring him far", or go like "wah that girl staffworker so solid one". you'll never know. the most ok one can be the most distant one.

so is it a duty when u see a brother and/or sister who seems to be fine, but something tells u some Something is eroding away. that zest, that love, that heart factor is losing it. so is it our duty if your good friend is headed for a life that is more concerned with enjoying rather than giving?
i would want my friends to do so when the day comes for me when i forget my Lord. i would want my friends to press on and perservere in the day when i refuse to hear, refuse to step out of my double lifestyle or a lipservice devo.
will i be that friend?

walk with Jesus daily.
God help us to.


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